Well yesterday was an ineresting doctors visit. He finally saw how dramatic my leg swelling is. When he walked into the room he kinda made a face like, "ohhh that sucks."
He was a little more progressive about it this time, he wanted to run some further blood tests and send me down to get another blood clot dopplar test on both of my legs. Before we left I told him how miserable I am and how much pain my legs are in and he did say that he probably won't have me go full term, probably like 37 or 38 weeks. Originally I was going to have them take her out via C-section on June 3rd which would be at 39 weeks but now I am hoping they will indeed take her out at either 37 or 38 weeks.
That would mean I would have only a month left.
He also wants me to get another ultrasound before my next appointment with him in two weeks so we can make sure the baby isn't suffering from my circulation problems and make see how big she really is.
Before we left the doctor said a couple funny things. He said that he wouldn't be surprised if I lose about 30-40 pounds of water after the baby comes. Corey and I laughed and said we hoped so because I am so swollen and he turned to Corey and said, "You know, like on that comercial where the lady walks out of a fat suit and she is all small and trim." Corey just laughed. But I do hope that happens because I am a freaking baloon. I weighed 174 yesterday at my appointment and I typically weight around 130 sometimes even less. Not to mention I have another month to go.
Today has been pretty miserable. I am so sore. I cant put into words what it feels like to have your legs hurt the way mine do. I put my finger ontop of my foot or press it on my calf and it is an instant pit. Truly it is so gross.
The pain is awful, I can't bend over and I can bairly walk, or get in and out of the bed or bath. It really is me telling the world that this is one of the worst experiences I have ever had to deal with. I wonder if its true what they say, the greater the sacrifice the greater the blessing. I imagine it is true. My dad and Corey gave me a blessing on Sunday night becuase I had a type of melt down on Sunday where I truly felt like I had been defeated and could not go on another day with all my ailments.
I got a phone call from my doctor today telling me that all my blood work came back normal except the protien in my blood was low and he thinks I need to be careful to eat more protien. I do struggle getting enough protien in my diet so that was interesting.
Tuesday, April 26, 2011
Thursday, April 14, 2011
Today is a zero day. I feel terrible. I really have nothing positive to say. I am about 32.5 weeks pregnant. I have perhaps never felt so awful in my life. Every piece of me feels like it is dying. Emotionally, physically, mentally, even spiritually.
I have not prayed much lately. Not the sincere, deliberate praying. I pray in my head or talk to Hevenly Father throughout the day, but I have not been able to pray the way I know I should.
Today I finally hit some peak of misery because I finally went into the baby's room and sat on the crib and told Heavenly Father how I have been feeling.
I don't know what will happen, but at least I got it out on the table. It seems sortive dumb to pray about something like not being able to hack it thru your pregnancy because it is clearly only going to get worse since I am not due for another 8 weeks. It isn't like he can make it all go away. I suppose it will simply get worse as she (and I) get larger and my body handles it EVEN less well.
I hate myself right now. I hate the kind of mother I am being to my Conner, I don't feel like I am being in any way productive in my house, and I am not being that great a wife or church member or friend or really anything.
I almost feel like I am wasting away.
How does it make sense to be in a position to nearly sacrifice one child for another? I am being a less than great mom to my son in order to bring a little girl to the world. I could never say this to anyone because it sounds like I don't want her. I have always, always wanted a baby girl. And part of me knows that when this is all over I will be infinately glad that I did it. But a small part of me worries that I won't feel that. Like what if I don't regain my health and strength after, or heaven forbid feel worse due to lack of sleep, recovery and breastfeeding. What if I never feel good again. What if there is something wrong with her and instead of relief I am about to sign up for a kid who I don't like, who is ugly, or has disabilities?
I can't express the despair that would come to me if I don't end up thinking this was the best sacrifice I have ever made.
I remember thinking life sucked while pregnant with Conner. But it was NEVER this bad. This is the longest, most miserable thing I can remember ever going through. Every aspect of it has drained me piece by piece. My self esteem is shot, I am ugly. Acne, pale as a ghost, red eyes, fat, and now the worst leg swelling I have ever seen on anyone.
I have not felt enegy for months. Months and Months. I can bairly go up our 8 stairs without feeling like I need a rest. And it has been that way almost the entire pregnancy!!! Not just the last month like you would expect. I have been on numerous medicines. I have had priesthood blessings. I can't seem to make any progress on feeling better. I have had severe acne, Severe -daily migraines, chronic rhinitis (stuffy nose.) I had two months of walking pneumonia.
I have had the most severe lethargy I can ever imagine. Now I have low iron and the most severe swelling I have ever seen. I can hardly walk. I cannot bend over. My house is a wreck. My son watches too much tv, eats poorly, and is not getting raised the way I want him to be, all because I am pregnant and ill. I have had tons of braxton hicks contractions. There have been days when I have taken three baths just to get thru the day with some comfort.
I have had to ask to be released from my calling at church as primary pianist and have missed a lot of church. I am now for perhaps the first time in my life experiencing some type of hemmroid problem. I have to poop every morning and it is such a weird consistancy that I have to wipe a hundred times and then I bleed and hurt the rest of the day, only to re awaken the sores the next morning.
At one point I had HORENDOUS smelling discharge. So bad I would have to bathe or shower twice a day. The stuffy nose I have had has come and gone from bad to worse at different times in the pregnancy but has been there consistantly. For the first time in my life I apparently snore. When I had the walking pneumonia I could quite literally NOT breath. I wanted to die. Not even kidding.
I don't know what is a worse hell, wearing compression panty hoes or being so swollen your legs are chapped from walking around thighs swishing against each other and feet that hurt to even look at. Under my ankle bone is so painful on both feet if someone touches it I immediately react.
I am on 60 mg or prozac. Not doing much of anything. I am on iron pills. I take ambien at night to get relief and try to sleep away some of the misery so I can manage to get up and try to get thru another day and fake to my son that I am ok.
The only thing that heplps is the Lortab I was prescribed for the terrible migrains I had in the early second trimester. I greatfully do not seem to be experiencing the migraines any longer but on bad days when my legs hurt of I do have a bad migraine or I feel I can bairly get out of bed I take half of one and it really helps. Too bad its totally not cool to take them more than absolutely necessary and as I get closer to birth I need to be sure she has no addiction to them and that I do not either. Therefore I could never take them daily to get thru my day.
I quite literally watch the lock tick past, waiting for Conner's bed time, waiting for the day to be over so I can take some ambien and escape my misery and make it to the next day. I literally count the days till I am full term several times a day, hoping that if I look at it a different way or calculate it a different way I will find out it is sooner than I thought or something.
I am insane.
I am quite disgusted with myself, and very, VERY disappointed to have felt nearly joyless for such a long time.
I feel alone. I day dream about feeling good again. Being able to bend over and pick laundry up off the ground. About fitting into normal clothes and not just sweats. About having clear skin again and going tanning so I look alive and not so ghostly. I feel like there is something wrong with me because to my knowledge most people do not feel this horrible when pregnant. Sure everyone has there days but the truth is, I have not had a good day in a long, long time. I would give anything to feel up for a nice brisk walk with Conner or to get on the treadmill and go a couple miles.
The truth is if I were due in two weeks I could do it. I could sit home for two weeks and give myself the permission to sit and ignore my duties and just endure. But 8 more weeks? Not only is that too long but I am terrified at how much worse I am going to feel as I get further. You get so much larger right at the end. You sleep even worse right at the end. If I can hardly walk now how will I function between now and 8 more weeks? I can't begin to express the hopeless, lonly depression that causes inside of me. And to make things worse, I can't wish for an early delivery because that would mean risks for the baby and risking not having her be with me or needing her to stay in the nicu or something. That doesn't help matters!
Give me a freaking hand. Throw me a rope. I can't make it. Why should I have to be unhappy, unhealthy, and miserable when I am doing such a great thing like bringing one of Gods special children into the world to be raised by loving dedicated parents in the gospel?
Surely the answer is one in which I have thought a lot about...I needed to learn from this experience. For a long time I could honestly say I didn't feel I had learned anything from this trial. I think as of this week I can see that I have learned something, whether or not it is what God wanted me to learn or not I do not know. But I have learned to be infinately grateful for my health. On just a normal day I didn't know how lucky I was to feel good enough to clean my house and draw chalk with my son on the driveway. I never knew I felt so good. In fact I would probably tell you I didn't feel good enough at that time. But looking back I would kill to feel the way I usually felt like a year ago.
I was listening to a book on tape a few weeks ago titled, Peace amidst Suffering. It was a talk given by a woman who was in the previous General Relief Society Presidency. The talk was good but one sentence stood out to me, hit me hard. The woman had served a mission in a foreign country and was apparently sick the whole time she served. If I remember correctly she knealt to pray asking why she had to feel so terrible while trying to do this noble and great thing which she could surely do an even better job at if she felt good. Her impression after that prayer was that the Lord was answering her with this simple sentence. "Would you have learned as much had you been well?"
That hit me hard. Because of the impression it has made on me I guess it is a message for me as well.
I think I can answer that no, I would not have learned as much had I not been so ill during this pregnancy. But I feel I have had so many more negative outcomes from this than positive which makes it hard to believe it would be beneficial for me to learn this lesson while sacrificing being as good a mom, wife, letting my house go, letting ME go, etc.
I am however happy to admit that it is true. I never realized how good I felt till I have experienced feeling so awful for such a long time. I will be forever grateful for when I feel good. I even told Heavenly Father today when I prayed that I will try to remember to simply be glad to feel good on a normal, uneventful everyday kind of day in the future just to be able to do my household chores and sit indian style with Conner and play a game with him on the floor. Just to feel alive again would mean the world to me.
I have not prayed much lately. Not the sincere, deliberate praying. I pray in my head or talk to Hevenly Father throughout the day, but I have not been able to pray the way I know I should.
Today I finally hit some peak of misery because I finally went into the baby's room and sat on the crib and told Heavenly Father how I have been feeling.
I don't know what will happen, but at least I got it out on the table. It seems sortive dumb to pray about something like not being able to hack it thru your pregnancy because it is clearly only going to get worse since I am not due for another 8 weeks. It isn't like he can make it all go away. I suppose it will simply get worse as she (and I) get larger and my body handles it EVEN less well.
I hate myself right now. I hate the kind of mother I am being to my Conner, I don't feel like I am being in any way productive in my house, and I am not being that great a wife or church member or friend or really anything.
I almost feel like I am wasting away.
How does it make sense to be in a position to nearly sacrifice one child for another? I am being a less than great mom to my son in order to bring a little girl to the world. I could never say this to anyone because it sounds like I don't want her. I have always, always wanted a baby girl. And part of me knows that when this is all over I will be infinately glad that I did it. But a small part of me worries that I won't feel that. Like what if I don't regain my health and strength after, or heaven forbid feel worse due to lack of sleep, recovery and breastfeeding. What if I never feel good again. What if there is something wrong with her and instead of relief I am about to sign up for a kid who I don't like, who is ugly, or has disabilities?
I can't express the despair that would come to me if I don't end up thinking this was the best sacrifice I have ever made.
I remember thinking life sucked while pregnant with Conner. But it was NEVER this bad. This is the longest, most miserable thing I can remember ever going through. Every aspect of it has drained me piece by piece. My self esteem is shot, I am ugly. Acne, pale as a ghost, red eyes, fat, and now the worst leg swelling I have ever seen on anyone.
I have not felt enegy for months. Months and Months. I can bairly go up our 8 stairs without feeling like I need a rest. And it has been that way almost the entire pregnancy!!! Not just the last month like you would expect. I have been on numerous medicines. I have had priesthood blessings. I can't seem to make any progress on feeling better. I have had severe acne, Severe -daily migraines, chronic rhinitis (stuffy nose.) I had two months of walking pneumonia.
I have had the most severe lethargy I can ever imagine. Now I have low iron and the most severe swelling I have ever seen. I can hardly walk. I cannot bend over. My house is a wreck. My son watches too much tv, eats poorly, and is not getting raised the way I want him to be, all because I am pregnant and ill. I have had tons of braxton hicks contractions. There have been days when I have taken three baths just to get thru the day with some comfort.
I have had to ask to be released from my calling at church as primary pianist and have missed a lot of church. I am now for perhaps the first time in my life experiencing some type of hemmroid problem. I have to poop every morning and it is such a weird consistancy that I have to wipe a hundred times and then I bleed and hurt the rest of the day, only to re awaken the sores the next morning.
At one point I had HORENDOUS smelling discharge. So bad I would have to bathe or shower twice a day. The stuffy nose I have had has come and gone from bad to worse at different times in the pregnancy but has been there consistantly. For the first time in my life I apparently snore. When I had the walking pneumonia I could quite literally NOT breath. I wanted to die. Not even kidding.
I don't know what is a worse hell, wearing compression panty hoes or being so swollen your legs are chapped from walking around thighs swishing against each other and feet that hurt to even look at. Under my ankle bone is so painful on both feet if someone touches it I immediately react.
I am on 60 mg or prozac. Not doing much of anything. I am on iron pills. I take ambien at night to get relief and try to sleep away some of the misery so I can manage to get up and try to get thru another day and fake to my son that I am ok.
The only thing that heplps is the Lortab I was prescribed for the terrible migrains I had in the early second trimester. I greatfully do not seem to be experiencing the migraines any longer but on bad days when my legs hurt of I do have a bad migraine or I feel I can bairly get out of bed I take half of one and it really helps. Too bad its totally not cool to take them more than absolutely necessary and as I get closer to birth I need to be sure she has no addiction to them and that I do not either. Therefore I could never take them daily to get thru my day.
I quite literally watch the lock tick past, waiting for Conner's bed time, waiting for the day to be over so I can take some ambien and escape my misery and make it to the next day. I literally count the days till I am full term several times a day, hoping that if I look at it a different way or calculate it a different way I will find out it is sooner than I thought or something.
I am insane.
I am quite disgusted with myself, and very, VERY disappointed to have felt nearly joyless for such a long time.
I feel alone. I day dream about feeling good again. Being able to bend over and pick laundry up off the ground. About fitting into normal clothes and not just sweats. About having clear skin again and going tanning so I look alive and not so ghostly. I feel like there is something wrong with me because to my knowledge most people do not feel this horrible when pregnant. Sure everyone has there days but the truth is, I have not had a good day in a long, long time. I would give anything to feel up for a nice brisk walk with Conner or to get on the treadmill and go a couple miles.
The truth is if I were due in two weeks I could do it. I could sit home for two weeks and give myself the permission to sit and ignore my duties and just endure. But 8 more weeks? Not only is that too long but I am terrified at how much worse I am going to feel as I get further. You get so much larger right at the end. You sleep even worse right at the end. If I can hardly walk now how will I function between now and 8 more weeks? I can't begin to express the hopeless, lonly depression that causes inside of me. And to make things worse, I can't wish for an early delivery because that would mean risks for the baby and risking not having her be with me or needing her to stay in the nicu or something. That doesn't help matters!
Give me a freaking hand. Throw me a rope. I can't make it. Why should I have to be unhappy, unhealthy, and miserable when I am doing such a great thing like bringing one of Gods special children into the world to be raised by loving dedicated parents in the gospel?
Surely the answer is one in which I have thought a lot about...I needed to learn from this experience. For a long time I could honestly say I didn't feel I had learned anything from this trial. I think as of this week I can see that I have learned something, whether or not it is what God wanted me to learn or not I do not know. But I have learned to be infinately grateful for my health. On just a normal day I didn't know how lucky I was to feel good enough to clean my house and draw chalk with my son on the driveway. I never knew I felt so good. In fact I would probably tell you I didn't feel good enough at that time. But looking back I would kill to feel the way I usually felt like a year ago.
I was listening to a book on tape a few weeks ago titled, Peace amidst Suffering. It was a talk given by a woman who was in the previous General Relief Society Presidency. The talk was good but one sentence stood out to me, hit me hard. The woman had served a mission in a foreign country and was apparently sick the whole time she served. If I remember correctly she knealt to pray asking why she had to feel so terrible while trying to do this noble and great thing which she could surely do an even better job at if she felt good. Her impression after that prayer was that the Lord was answering her with this simple sentence. "Would you have learned as much had you been well?"
That hit me hard. Because of the impression it has made on me I guess it is a message for me as well.
I think I can answer that no, I would not have learned as much had I not been so ill during this pregnancy. But I feel I have had so many more negative outcomes from this than positive which makes it hard to believe it would be beneficial for me to learn this lesson while sacrificing being as good a mom, wife, letting my house go, letting ME go, etc.
I am however happy to admit that it is true. I never realized how good I felt till I have experienced feeling so awful for such a long time. I will be forever grateful for when I feel good. I even told Heavenly Father today when I prayed that I will try to remember to simply be glad to feel good on a normal, uneventful everyday kind of day in the future just to be able to do my household chores and sit indian style with Conner and play a game with him on the floor. Just to feel alive again would mean the world to me.
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
Monday I went to the doctor for my 17 week appointment. He did another ultrasound and he thinks it is a GIRL!!! The ultrasound machine in his office is a little grainy and I am a tad early, so he said we will know for sure at my official ultrasound in two weeks.
Tomorrow I will be 18 weeks. For the past two weeks I feel like I have felt a feeling of "floating" in my uterus. As tho something was floating up or something. No kicking. However today, for perhaps the first time, I was standing in the bathroom and thought I felt the most slight little tapping.
I cannot wait to find out what I am having for sure so I can talk about it openly. I weighed 144 lbs. at the appointment on monday. I have continued to feel headaches nearly every day, but none so bad as the ones in december. I have also been extremely lazy and lethargic most of the day, every day. Even tho I struggle to sleep well at night. Such a pain. SUCH A PAIN.
But when I left the doctors office on Monday after the ultrasound he did I can't deny I broke into tears in my car and thanked Heavenly Father for the incredible blessing of perhaps having a baby girl all my own after all this struggle of a pregnancy. It made it all feel worth it. I also asked my doctor if the spine on the baby looked good and he said yep everything looks good. That poured relief through my whole soul as I am always worried about the babys health or whatever.
Tomorrow I will be 18 weeks. For the past two weeks I feel like I have felt a feeling of "floating" in my uterus. As tho something was floating up or something. No kicking. However today, for perhaps the first time, I was standing in the bathroom and thought I felt the most slight little tapping.
I cannot wait to find out what I am having for sure so I can talk about it openly. I weighed 144 lbs. at the appointment on monday. I have continued to feel headaches nearly every day, but none so bad as the ones in december. I have also been extremely lazy and lethargic most of the day, every day. Even tho I struggle to sleep well at night. Such a pain. SUCH A PAIN.
But when I left the doctors office on Monday after the ultrasound he did I can't deny I broke into tears in my car and thanked Heavenly Father for the incredible blessing of perhaps having a baby girl all my own after all this struggle of a pregnancy. It made it all feel worth it. I also asked my doctor if the spine on the baby looked good and he said yep everything looks good. That poured relief through my whole soul as I am always worried about the babys health or whatever.
Friday, December 17, 2010
The most notable thing that has happened with my pregnancy in the past few weeks is the dramatic migraines I have been having for the past three weeks. They have been completely and utterly awful. I have been taking tons of tylenol but it does nothing at all. I finally called the doctors office and told them what was happening and thankfully they called me in some Lortab. I was very hesitant to take something other than tylenol but I felt so desperate after having been in so much pain for so long. I felt I was willing to do anything to get rid of it. I have felt that I owe it to Conner (and Corey) to get feeling better.
I took one of the Lortabs and threw up about fifteen minutes later. I assume I threw up the pill but amazingly later I felt so much better, some of the pill must have gotten to my brain and helped.
That was on Tuesday and today is Friday. I felt the best I have felt in three weeks yesterday. I felt like I could do anything. I don't know if I was so used to having a constant nagging pain and without it I felt like a million bucks. I however woke up with a headache again this morning and it has progressively gotten worse and is kinda bad this evening. I feel so bad having to take the pill. But on Wednesday I called the doctors office again and asked again about the pain pill and if it was safe. The nurse assured me that Lortab is approved for pregnancy. So I have to just have faith that the baby will be ok. I also had Corey and my dad give me a blessing on the worst pain night.
I took one of the Lortabs and threw up about fifteen minutes later. I assume I threw up the pill but amazingly later I felt so much better, some of the pill must have gotten to my brain and helped.
That was on Tuesday and today is Friday. I felt the best I have felt in three weeks yesterday. I felt like I could do anything. I don't know if I was so used to having a constant nagging pain and without it I felt like a million bucks. I however woke up with a headache again this morning and it has progressively gotten worse and is kinda bad this evening. I feel so bad having to take the pill. But on Wednesday I called the doctors office again and asked again about the pain pill and if it was safe. The nurse assured me that Lortab is approved for pregnancy. So I have to just have faith that the baby will be ok. I also had Corey and my dad give me a blessing on the worst pain night.
Thursday, December 9, 2010
December 8 2010
I saw the doctor yesterday for my 14 week appointment. I got another ultrasound which was delightful. Seeing that baby is so wonderful. I can't deny I was still not sure the baby was alive and well, but it was. My boobs are still enormous, they are still sore but I think perhaps a little less sore than a few weeks ago.
My uterus is definitely noticeable when I lay down and feel it. It is about half way to my navel now.
Before I became pregnant I weighed about 130 and as of yesterday at my appointment I weighed 140.
WOW. That is a lot for only 14 weeks?!?
I have been worried about it but I am hoping it will slow down later.
What else? My acne is still really bad. VERY bad. Never have I had trouble like this before.
I asked my doctor yesterday about the concerns I have.
1. heating pad use
2. hot baths
3. diet coke
4. my weight
5. acne
6. sleep struggles
His answers are in red.
He seems like a nice man. I think I will enjoy having him as my doctor.
I hesitate to say what gender I think this baby is. I will not lie I hope it is a girl. Tho I know from experience that either is wonderful.
I remember thinking Conner was a girl, and feeling a little disappointed after the ultrasound revealed he was a boy.
Conner almost exclusively tells us that it is a girl. Corey and my mom think its a girl. I have noticed differences in this pregnancy...the acne didn't happen with Conner, headaches have been daily the past two weeks and I didn't have those with Conner hardly at all. I have had much more weight gain and extreme hunger pains, empty stomach feelings every two hours. I have craved heavy foods like Meals, such as meats and cheeses and sandwiches. I am not one to typically crave sandwiches. I think the first noticable craving I had during this pregnancy was a Jimmy Johns sandwich. I have had them several times so far and usually wolf the whole thing down. They are large.
I have felt very similarly as far as sickness in the stomach goes with this pregnancy and Conner.
The heart rate on this baby is VERY fast. The doctor said that might indicate a girl but who knows.
As you can see I am wishing for a girl, but I know i will be delighted with any healthy wonderful child. I know that because of the sheer goodness and joy that has come from having Conner. The love I have for that NUT is overwhelming. I have love for him that surpasses any emotion I have ever felt. Even tho sometimes he drives me CRAZY!!! :)
My uterus is definitely noticeable when I lay down and feel it. It is about half way to my navel now.
Before I became pregnant I weighed about 130 and as of yesterday at my appointment I weighed 140.
WOW. That is a lot for only 14 weeks?!?
I have been worried about it but I am hoping it will slow down later.
What else? My acne is still really bad. VERY bad. Never have I had trouble like this before.
I asked my doctor yesterday about the concerns I have.
1. heating pad use
2. hot baths
3. diet coke
4. my weight
5. acne
6. sleep struggles
His answers are in red.
He seems like a nice man. I think I will enjoy having him as my doctor.
I hesitate to say what gender I think this baby is. I will not lie I hope it is a girl. Tho I know from experience that either is wonderful.
I remember thinking Conner was a girl, and feeling a little disappointed after the ultrasound revealed he was a boy.
Conner almost exclusively tells us that it is a girl. Corey and my mom think its a girl. I have noticed differences in this pregnancy...the acne didn't happen with Conner, headaches have been daily the past two weeks and I didn't have those with Conner hardly at all. I have had much more weight gain and extreme hunger pains, empty stomach feelings every two hours. I have craved heavy foods like Meals, such as meats and cheeses and sandwiches. I am not one to typically crave sandwiches. I think the first noticable craving I had during this pregnancy was a Jimmy Johns sandwich. I have had them several times so far and usually wolf the whole thing down. They are large.
I have felt very similarly as far as sickness in the stomach goes with this pregnancy and Conner.
The heart rate on this baby is VERY fast. The doctor said that might indicate a girl but who knows.
As you can see I am wishing for a girl, but I know i will be delighted with any healthy wonderful child. I know that because of the sheer goodness and joy that has come from having Conner. The love I have for that NUT is overwhelming. I have love for him that surpasses any emotion I have ever felt. Even tho sometimes he drives me CRAZY!!! :)
Saturday, October 9, 2010
5 weeks
I cannot believe the time has finally come. I am pregnant for the 2nd time. This time is very similar to my pregnancy with Conner and VERY different in some ways.
I don't remember EVER feeling dizzy when pregnant with Conner, but for some reason I am intesely dizzy this time. As of today I am 5 weeks pregnant. I missed my period last Friday, and because pregnancy is usually measured by the first day of your last period I am 5 weeks. I have this intense dizzyness, sore nipples, fatigue, high appetite, and the very first week I noticed a very dramatic urge to pee all the time. I haven't had much nausea, possibly a few waves of it, but not much.
I had a very small amount of spotting last Saturday while we were watching Conference at Midway. I didn't necessarily panic because the same thing happened with Conner. Implantation bleeding. It has not happened again so I suppose it was just implantation. I did however need to go get another blood test and a shot called Rhogam because I have A negative blood and Corey is positive so if my baby is positive blood then my body could attack the baby as a foreign object.
The rohgam shot protects this from happening.
Again I had to go thru all this with Conner too.
I must admit I am very uneasy about the pregnancy. I keep thinking I should be feeling more one way or the other...assuming I won't have a healthy pregnancy. I constantly check to see if I am bleeding. I'm so annoying. But seriously its difficult not to get paranoid when Melissa just had a terrible still birth, Sarah just had TWO miscarriages one right after the other at about 15 weeks. But at the same time I know I was paranoid about miscarrying with Conner and he was/is perfect.
Corey is delighted...he is so excited. The baby will be born in June, what a great time to have a baby! We haven't told many people yet. We told my parents, Corey's parents, Chris, Ash, Chris and Brittni Cotton, and that is about it.
I would like to wait to tell anyone else till after we see the doctor. Which is scheduled for November 10th. The doctor who delivered Conner, Dr. Larkin, retired this year. So I am scheduled to see Dr. Barton from the same practice.
There are a lot of things that are hard about being pregnant. But I am really hoping this works out. It is difficult not to be skeptical at the beginning when so many things can go wrong and there is no kicking, showing, and we haven't seen a doctor. But I am trying to have faith.
I don't remember EVER feeling dizzy when pregnant with Conner, but for some reason I am intesely dizzy this time. As of today I am 5 weeks pregnant. I missed my period last Friday, and because pregnancy is usually measured by the first day of your last period I am 5 weeks. I have this intense dizzyness, sore nipples, fatigue, high appetite, and the very first week I noticed a very dramatic urge to pee all the time. I haven't had much nausea, possibly a few waves of it, but not much.
I had a very small amount of spotting last Saturday while we were watching Conference at Midway. I didn't necessarily panic because the same thing happened with Conner. Implantation bleeding. It has not happened again so I suppose it was just implantation. I did however need to go get another blood test and a shot called Rhogam because I have A negative blood and Corey is positive so if my baby is positive blood then my body could attack the baby as a foreign object.
The rohgam shot protects this from happening.
Again I had to go thru all this with Conner too.
I must admit I am very uneasy about the pregnancy. I keep thinking I should be feeling more one way or the other...assuming I won't have a healthy pregnancy. I constantly check to see if I am bleeding. I'm so annoying. But seriously its difficult not to get paranoid when Melissa just had a terrible still birth, Sarah just had TWO miscarriages one right after the other at about 15 weeks. But at the same time I know I was paranoid about miscarrying with Conner and he was/is perfect.
Corey is delighted...he is so excited. The baby will be born in June, what a great time to have a baby! We haven't told many people yet. We told my parents, Corey's parents, Chris, Ash, Chris and Brittni Cotton, and that is about it.
I would like to wait to tell anyone else till after we see the doctor. Which is scheduled for November 10th. The doctor who delivered Conner, Dr. Larkin, retired this year. So I am scheduled to see Dr. Barton from the same practice.
There are a lot of things that are hard about being pregnant. But I am really hoping this works out. It is difficult not to be skeptical at the beginning when so many things can go wrong and there is no kicking, showing, and we haven't seen a doctor. But I am trying to have faith.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)